Bride kidnapping at a wedding in 2021: what do traditions and modernity say?

The abduction and ransom of the bride is a competition for a banquet that will not allow you to relax and will bring the groom back into shape. It will also bring a lot of fun to the gathered guests, some of whom may not have been present at the ransom at the bride's entrance.

At almost every wedding, the bride is kidnapped and then a ransom is demanded from the groom. Surely, the bride will also be kidnapped at your wedding, so it is better to prepare for this from the beginning.

From this article you will learn how to organize a theft and where best to hide the bride, as well as how to inform the toastmaster about the impending abduction.

How can you punish the witnesses and the groom?

There are many ways to punish witnesses and the groom who missed the bride, and here are some of them:
• Place in front of the witnesses two plates with champagne or wine poured into them, which they must drink without using their hands;

• Give witnesses three lollipops. Each of them must very quickly unwrap all the candies and put them in their mouths. When all the candies are in the mouth, the witness and witness must say an impromptu congratulation to the newlyweds;

• Ask witnesses to act out a scene in which the witness is the wife and the witness is the husband. Let the presenter give the husband some banknote, which the husband allegedly received at work as a bonus and decided to make a nest egg from his wife. Having hidden the money under the collar of his shirt, in a tie, in a sock or a secret pocket, he returns home. The wife must return the money to the family by finding the money in any way;

• Ask witnesses to act out a scene in which the witness is a mother who has just given birth to a baby, and the witness is the father of a newborn child who has come to visit his wife in the maternity hospital. Due to quarantine, the husband is not allowed into the maternity hospital, and the ward in which the wife is lying is on a high floor. The husband stands under the windows of the maternity hospital and his task is to find out as much information as possible about the newborn child, asking all kinds of questions. The wife should answer without words, using only facial expressions and gestures;

• Demand that the witness sing a song about a chocolate bunny or dance “Gypsy” with a mop as punishment;

• Let the witness and the groom dance “Lezginka” with knives in their teeth, and let the witness put a jug (plastic bottle) of water on her shoulder or head and dance with it.

If you yourself are unable to come up with worthy punishments for the groom and witnesses, in this you can safely trust an experienced presenter, who has repeatedly carried out these “tortures” on the guilty! Happy marriage!

Bride price process

The kidnappers appear in the hall and say that they have stolen the bride. As proof, they show the shoe from the bride's foot and ask for a ransom for its return. The witness with a tray goes around all those gathered, taking a ransom from everyone. But the thieves refuse to take the amount received - it is too small.

“Why have you collected so little money! That means he asked badly!” The groom and the witness are given a task.

This could be a task like this:

  • sing a song in a duet;
  • dance a funny dance;
  • drink a plate of champagne or wine hands-free;
  • striptease performed by a witness - watches, socks and other small items are removed.

The toastmaster can also come up with a task for the groom and witness. The funnier the task, the more interesting it will be for guests to watch.

KNOWLEDGE BASE: Gypsy dances at Russian weddings (video)

After completing the task, the witness again goes around the guests and collects money. This time the kidnappers agree and go after the bride, leaving the shoe to the groom.

Since the groom has the shoe, the girl cannot walk on her own. A very touching and beautiful wedding moment is coming. One of the kidnappers carries the bride in his arms.

How does bride kidnapping happen at a modern wedding?

In order for everything to go according to plan, the script should be prepared in advance. What is needed for this?

  1. So that there is no surprise for the bride, she is informed about the time of the abduction. This information must also be communicated to the toastmaster and to those who will abduct.
  2. Find people who will agree to kidnap the newly-made bride. This should be done by those people who will be adequate, will not be very drunk, and they should also have a sense of humor.
  3. You need to think about where you will hide the bride after she is kidnapped. You should not use dark closets, basements and kitchens for this purpose. You should also not take it far by car.
  4. You need to come up with tasks that the groom must complete in order to find his bride.
  5. Prepare all the necessary props that will be needed to kidnap the young woman.
  6. The bride is only kidnapped once per wedding, so guests should be prohibited from stealing again.

It is best to hide her in a room in which she will not stain her dress, and will be able to observe everything that will happen in the banquet hall.

Leading

Agree on the “Stole the Bride” competition at the wedding with the host so that the theft only brings additional joy and fun.

Valentine

For the “Bride Stealing at a Wedding” competition, there are several rules that are best adhered to.

There is no need to take the bride far away or hide her in dusty basements or utility rooms, because this idea can ruin the wedding image. It is advisable that the bride sees the actions that the groom is ready for for her. It is important not to delay the action, let the theft and the process of finding the bride last no longer than 15-20 minutes.

Bride kidnapping in different countries

In the minds of many, bride kidnapping occurs more often in the Caucasus. Although this custom is widespread there, it is still often found in many countries of Central Asia and even in Africa.

Rwanda, South Africa, South Sudan

These African countries have strong wedding rules and traditions. The custom of abduction here is called “ukuthwala”. According to it, the groom who stole the girl he liked is obliged to pay her family a dowry. Usually this is a symbolic payment of several heads of livestock. After which the wedding takes place. However, in modern society the fight against forced marriages is becoming tougher, and therefore the girl has the right to bring charges against the kidnapper. The maximum penalty for theft in South Africa is life imprisonment.

Ethiopia

In this country, the ritual of bride kidnapping is also common, although without the subsequent bride price. The authorities were seriously concerned about this problem and introduced a law according to which the kidnapper receives a punishment of five to fifteen years in prison.

Kyrgyzstan

A search for abductions can find hundreds of videos from the Caucasus. However, bride kidnapping occurs much more often in Kyrgyzstan. According to statistics, up to 30 girls are stolen every day, and per year their number exceeds ten thousand. In the leading country, this ceremony is called “ala kachuu” and takes place without the consent of the bride or her parents. Often the girls who are stolen have not yet reached adulthood. The country provides for punishment for kidnapping in the form of a fine and imprisonment. However, not every victim brings charges due to the risk of shame.

Caucasus countries

Bride kidnapping is also quite common in the Caucasus. Grooms hire people or ask friends to steal the girls they like for them. Until relatively recently, these actions were completely legal. The ban on kidnapping was introduced in Chechnya in 2010, in Ingushetia in 2013, in Georgia in 2014.

It is important to note that in many countries of the Caucasus Islam is practiced, where bride kidnapping is also prohibited. But this does not stop guys in love who still commit similar acts to this day. Many locals consider the tradition quite normal. For example, a Dagestan wedding has many revered customs, and bride kidnapping is one of them.

Russia, Belarus, Ukraine

In our countries, bride kidnapping is considered a beautiful ancient tradition that takes place at a wedding. The custom has some romantic and humorous overtones. It follows a pre-planned scenario and is done more with the goal of entertaining the guests. However, tradition also has its meaning. It is believed that it helps to test the true feelings of the groom and find out what he is ready for for the sake of his beloved.

Entertainment on the road

Even the road to the registry office and restaurant can be made memorable. You can organize light entertainment for the bride on the way to the wedding or a small photo shoot. Particularly beautiful shots are obtained if the newlyweds have chosen an unusual type of transport, for example, a carriage. Along the way, it is also possible to film a congratulatory part of the video or hold small competitions in the form of a survey. Try not to tire the bride too much on the way, because the most important and solemn part of the event awaits her ahead.

Practical tips and recommendations for choosing and holding wedding competitions for the bride are below.

  • Choose competitions in which the bride can show her talents and abilities: dancing, art or artistic.
  • Try to eliminate inconvenient questions and controversial issues
  • Competitions in which the bride must guess the groom using a certain thing or blindfolded look very advantageous.
  • When choosing, do not forget to take into account the season, location, style of the wedding, as well as the outfit of the future wife
  • For the bride, 1-2 separate competitions are enough
  • The “Bride Stole at a Wedding” competition should be organized by the most creative and charismatic friend of the groom, who can beat any situation.

Don't forget that wedding competitions should be varied and interesting. Try to involve every participant, and then this wedding will definitely be remembered by everyone for a long time!

Bride kidnapping tradition

Later in Rus', bride theft became more cruel and humiliating: the master stole the bride from the wedding if she was his serf, and if the groom could not buy his bride from him, then she returned to her husband only in the morning.

And then the only option left for the young people was to steal their beloved. Bride kidnappings are still taking place in the Caucasus and Kyrgyzstan.

Of course, now these are mostly playful kidnappings that occur by agreement of the bride and groom, but among these nationalities, forced weddings are also quite common, when the bride does not even know who her abductor is, and in the future her husband.

Bride kidnapping at a modern wedding

Nowadays, not a single wedding is complete without a symbolic repetition of such an ancient ritual as bride kidnapping, especially in the style of a quest.

Nowadays, bride kidnapping is just a fun touch in the wedding scenario. And in order for everything to be truly fun, it is necessary to prepare well the moment of the bride’s abduction.

So, in order for everything to happen without surprises, you need:

  1. Set an hour for the kidnapping and inform about it: the bride, the toastmaster, the kidnappers themselves, and let the groom guess.
  2. Appoint kidnappers. This cannot be discussed with guests, as it is assumed that by this point in the wedding they are no longer completely sober. Kidnappers must be adequate, with a developed sense of humor and proportion.
  3. Think over the place where the bride will be taken after the abduction. Let it not be basements, storage rooms, kitchens and other work rooms. They also do not take the bride far in a car. In no case will she be harmed, her wedding dress will not be soiled, and the young woman cannot be offended. In addition, it is better to place her in a room from which the bride can see everything that the witness and husband are capable of for her return.
  4. Come up with tasks for the groom that he will complete to return his beloved. It would be better if all competitions were about the bride.
  5. Prepare props, if needed, to stage a bride kidnapping.
  6. Prohibit guests from stealing the bride again. This is the rule: the bride must be stolen once, she is ransomed quickly and then everyone returns to the festive table.

Scenarios of bride theft from a wedding

There are a huge number of scenarios for carrying out such a colorful ritual.

  • You can use your own imagination, not use other people’s ideas, and create your own scenario for kidnapping a bride from a wedding.
  • Or you can use existing ones, the most common of which are listed below.

Scenario of bride kidnapping by gypsies

A distinctive feature of such a kidnapping is the fact that the gypsies can be paid with fake money for the return of the bride.

Scenario of a bride being kidnapped by a detachment of armed special forces

This version of abduction will also require a lot of props: a uniform and weapons, but the positive feature is the fact that it is not necessary to take the bride anywhere.

Armed young men can simply surround her and begin to demand a ransom from the groom.

Bride kidnapping scenario “Caucasian Captive”

There are very few people in Russia who are not familiar with this film. Therefore, guests will immediately recognize the costumes of the characters in this film - the Coward, the Experienced and the Goonie.

And also in this version of bride kidnapping, you can slip the groom a fake bride - a sleeping bag with a blanket inside, without a bride, and demand that he complete more and more new tasks.

Bride kidnapping scenario “Koloboks are conducting the investigation”

This scenario involves the inclusion of many, many guests in the action; few props are required here, but a lot of competitions for the guests and separately for the groom and witness need to be prepared.

In addition to these scenario options, there are many more interesting ways to kidnap a bride from a wedding and ransom her from the kidnappers.

However, it will be much more fun and original to come up with your own individual scenario for repeating the ancient ritual, which will once again give the young woman the opportunity to be convinced of the love of her groom.

Funny scenario of a bride being kidnapped at a wedding.

Many people think that all the groom's trials on the wedding day occurred during the bride price. But in reality this is not so, because there is also theft of a girl. The tradition appeared due to the fact that some parents did not want to give their daughters in marriage, and in order to be with their beloved, the guy had to kidnap her.

These times are long gone, but the traditions remain, so it is important to decide how bride kidnapping will take place at an event such as a wedding, the scenario of which must be planned in advance. In addition to the fact that planning will help the toastmaster choose the right moment, it will also give the opportunity to choose an unusual plot

The Custom of Bride Kidnapping: A Brief History

One of the most widespread and ancient wedding rituals is bride kidnapping. Traditions like this have their origins in the distant past. She was born during the times of ancient countries always warring among themselves, for example, in the Caucasus. Back then, it was much easier and more profitable to steal the girl you liked than to arrange long matchmaking ceremonies that could drag on for months.

Another reason why the custom of bride kidnapping appeared was money. For a good wife, it was necessary to pay a ransom or bride price, which could amount to exorbitant sums. Often young people did not have the means to do this, and therefore resolved the issue with brute force.

Another prerequisite was the refusal of the girls or her parents. If the beauty did not like the groom and she did not want to marry him, theft was the only option to marry her, since after the ceremony the girl had no other options. After a night spent in the kidnapper's house, the bride was considered "spoiled" and therefore no one else would want to marry her. Such scandalous weddings did not inspire approval among many people at that time, but, nevertheless, the tradition was preserved and migrated to the modern world.

The Slavs also did not stand aside. However, their abduction of the bride took place more humanely and necessarily by mutual consent of the young people. At the height of major holidays, the guy took the girl into the forest, and after time spent alone, she was automatically considered his wife, and they began to live together.

Where did the custom come from?

Before telling you what competitions you can hold to buy shoes at a wedding, you should explain where this tradition came from and what determines it. This ritual appeared specifically among the Slavic peoples. In Ancient Rus', after a wedding, a young woman was asked to try on her shoes by her unmarried girlfriends. If one of them got their shoes at the right time, it meant that this girl would soon get married.

Photo of the bride's shoes

But after the fitting procedure, the friend decided to check how generous the young man was and did not give the shoe to its rightful owner. The girl asked her young husband for a certain amount to return the stolen property, since it would be difficult for the bride to dance without shoes.

The newlywed had the right to cheat and pay with sweets or fruits instead of money. There have been cases where the friends of the young man quietly stole an accessory from the newlywed's girlfriend when she was distracted.

Today, the purchase of the newlywed's shoes is arranged solely for entertainment purposes, to amuse the guests and have fun themselves.

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Abduction by gypsies

If you want your bride theft to be a spectacular spectacle, then this can be arranged with the help of invited gypsies. Brightness and vigor are achieved through cheerful songs and motley colorful outfits. For this, you may need purchased costumes for gypsies, if they do not have their own, guitars, tambourines and scarves.

First, young gypsy women enter singing and surround the groom. And so that he cannot leave the circle of girls, they must wave their scarves and skirts. Then he will not be able to see what is happening beyond this circle. While the gypsies distract the groom, two gypsies take the bride away and hide her in a secret place.

But when the groom discovers that the bride has been kidnapped, he will have to pay a ransom for her, otherwise no one will give his newly-made wife for free. Watch the video.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=PRfk0XvMs6o

What can you offer the groom as a ransom?

  1. Pay with money. This can be either real or fake money.
  2. He can sing a beautiful song that will be dedicated to their love.
  3. If he dances an original dance, it will also be very fun and fiery.
  4. You can also invite the groom to take part in a comic competition.

After the ransom is approved by all the kidnappers, the bride is returned to the rightful hands of the groom.

Bride kidnapping by wedding guests

You need to think through the entire scenario and props in advance so that everything planned goes smoothly and unforgettably.

Abduction by gypsies

This type of theft will look very good, since the gypsies add zest to the celebration with their atmosphere, colorful dances and unique speech.

To make everything look beautiful and natural at the celebration, you should:

  1. Order actors who will act out any scenario; it is thanks to colorful costumes and professional acting that the desired atmosphere of the event will be achieved.
  2. You should also order another hero who will conduct direct negotiations with the young man and his relatives.
  3. You can choose a more economical option, but no less boring - you should agree in advance with the bride’s friends, who will find costumes and play the role of gypsies.

The most important thing is not the costumes, but the right moment. A company of cheerful and perky gypsies should burst into the hall, who with their singing and ditties will distract not only the groom, but also the guests

And thanks to their magnificent costumes, the gypsies dance around the bride and take her out of the hall so that no one notices.

Demands that can be put forward to the husband.

  1. Dance a gypsy dance, of course.
  2. Sing a serenade.
  3. Play a song on any instrument.

After the buildings are completed, the man is given a friend dressed in women's clothing, and in order to receive a wife, he must pay an agreed amount of money.

In the style of a Caucasian captive

To carry out a stylized theft, inspired by the cult film “Prisoner of the Caucasus”, you will need:

  • prepared remarks;
  • 2 sleeping bags and one blanket;
  • white rope;
  • shoes;
  • flesh-colored stockings;
  • cotton wool;
  • pillows.

You need to make the base of the “body” from pillows and ropes, stuff the stockings with cotton wool, and then insert them into the shoes.

At the right moment, the thieves must approach the newlyweds, take the bride, and plant a silhouette of the body in her place.

While the girl is being taken away, you need to convince your husband that this is a ritual that is constantly performed at weddings.

Afterwards, the girl is wrapped in a blanket and taken away, while the husband is left alone. Only after this do three guys in disguise come into the hall and convince the young man that he needs to do a courage test.

After the test has been passed, the stuffed animal must be brought again, as if the captive had been returned. Before anyone notices, you should run away, but slowly, so that the groom and his boyfriend can catch up with the kidnappers, pay off and take the bride.

Armed attack

To pull off a theft like this, you need quality props and people who will play their roles flawlessly.

In this case, the spouse is taken a short distance, after which they begin to demand money from the husband and to pass tests. At least 5 people must pick up the bride.

Tests that can be proposed to be completed.

  1. Peel the potatoes for a while.
  2. Hit the target.
  3. Squats or other types of physical activity.

If you are playing out a raider takeover scenario, you need to demand a ransom; if the groom does not have money, then he is given a bag and sent to collect money from the guests; if there is little money, you can offer to take part in a quiz.

Script based on the film "Prisoner of the Caucasus"

Only a baby probably hasn't seen this movie. Therefore, if you choose suitable costumes, all the guests, and the groom himself, will understand that they are about to kidnap the bride. To do this, you need to find three young men whose build will resemble the characters in the film. You also need to rent or buy a sleeping bag.

Young people in disguise must take the bride away from the festive hall, and then return back and begin to demand a ransom from the groom. For ransom, you can prepare themed songs and toasts. First, they can slip the groom a sleeping bag without the bride, stuffed with something. But when the groom realizes that he has been deceived, he can reclaim his bride. And only after that, the thieves return the young wife back.

Quest script for a wedding

Quest is an original and exciting way to entertain guests

Do you want to know at what wedding stages it can be organized? Then take a look at the list below:

  • Quest as a scenario for bride ransom. An excellent opportunity to start getting acquainted with guests is to arrange a quest for the groom with a witness and everyone go together to find the bride. The game will set a good tone and mood for the celebration.
  • Wedding walk. During the newlyweds' photo shoot, guests don't have to be bored on the sidelines. Let the bride and groom take pictures, and the guests will be involved in the exciting action. You can spend your free time in an exciting competition or get by with solving riddles. There are many ideas for entertaining guests - it all depends on your preferences.
  • Banquet. This could be a quest - searching for a kidnapped bride, a stolen shoe, or a quest instead of the traditional bouquet throwing. If you wish, you can build the entire wedding in a quest format.
  • The next day. All the solemn moments of the wedding are over, so the script for the second day of the wedding may well include some kind of active quest for guests or newlyweds.

Buying the bride's shoe

Competitions for the groom's team

The arriving thieves begin to frantically bargain and demand ransom for such an important detail of the bride’s wedding dress.

The groom is offered various tests, for example:

  • you need to depict a pantomime based on Pushkin’s poem “There is a green oak at the seaside” (or something similar, with many images and semantic dynamics) without prior preparation. 1 minute is given to assign roles. The voice-over text is read by one of the thieves, and “with feeling, sensibly, with precision”;
  • dance the cancan with the whole team - the groom's friends;
  • agree to drink as much champagne from the bride’s shoe as will be poured into it;
  • men usually do not have a very good memory when it comes to women’s outfits, hairstyles, and shoes. You can play on this. The groom is offered 5-6 white shoes (prepared in advance) and is invited to recognize the bride. Moreover, during the competition the groom should not see the second shoe. Paradoxically, few people recognize their bride’s shoe.
  • the most commonplace way is to simply pay, but the mummers must agree to the payment after conducting a series of tests. Otherwise it won't be interesting.

Competitions for the bride's team

The point is that, also in the midst of the dance program, it is discovered that the stylish groom is standing in one sock and announces that the shoe has disappeared in an unknown direction.

The bride is in panic, the guests are terrified, and thieves appear in the wedding arena. We mentioned the appearance of thieves above.

The bride is offered the following tests:

  • dance without shoes with the oldest guest;
  • dance without shoes with the youngest guest;
  • pull in and tie the laces on men's shoes for a while (for example, 1 minute);
  • recognize the blindfolded groom's shoe among many men's shoes;
  • “give out”, again, a fiery cancan together with his team.
  • after all the tests - pay, you can offer a kiss to each thief as a ransom.

Competitions for the bride and groom

You can simultaneously organize a shoe purchase for both the bride and groom. Payment for the shoes can be any joint action of the bride and groom, symbolizing joint overcoming of difficulties in family life.

This could be sawing logs, picking up broken dishes for good luck, feeding pets, etc.

In the process of buying a shoe, special attention should be paid to the photo shoot: what could be more interesting for future children than your wedding photos in the company of fairy-tale characters, all kinds of kikimoras, witches, goblin, devils, cowboys, pirates? A professional photographer will take excellent staged photographs that will turn your wedding album into a real masterpiece!

Remember: the more rituals and traditions presented at the wedding, the brighter and more interesting the celebration will be. The main thing is not to overdo it and harmoniously integrate traditions into the wedding scenario.

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Bride kidnapping in the Caucasus

In what cases does bride kidnapping occur?

The history of this ritual is as old as the world. From chronicles, as well as historical treatises, you can find out that the ancient Romans, Slavic peoples and men of the East have won their betrothed in this way since ancient times. In confirmation of chronicles and treatises, the Biblical Book of Judges tells of the prolongation of the Veniamin family through the abduction of the girls of Israel. All this, of course, is a thing of the past, but without the origins, there would be no modernity.

Society does not stand still in its development; with the progress of cultural and social life, women have acquired equal rights with men. But customs and traditions have not changed much. Whether they are good or bad can be judged for a very long time and to no avail. What is better: thoughtlessly marry a stranger or wait your whole life for your one and only? What if he never comes?

Most people consider the ritual of bride kidnapping to be criminal and barbaric, but, despite everything, Caucasian men and women maintain this tradition today. In what cases does a Caucasian bride get kidnapped?

1. Solving financial problems: the kidnapping of a girl makes it possible not to pay bride price to her parents.

2. The groom's social status is lower than that of his beloved. When the groom realizes that the bride's parents will not give consent to the wedding, he organizes her abduction.

3. The most common option: I just liked the girl. A Caucasian bride is most likely unaware of her future husband's intentions. Sometimes, this method of winning a girl’s favor ends in failure, but more often than not, an atmosphere of love reigns in Caucasian families. Women for the most part love brave men.

4. The best option for kidnapping is out of mutual love. When young people really like each other, but, due to some circumstances, cannot start a family, they can agree on such a theft.

The reasons why young people in the Caucasus cannot get married are different:

A guy and a girl love each other, but their families are categorically against the wedding. In this case, the kidnapping of a Caucasian bride is a tribute to an ancient tradition.

A situation where a girl’s family wants to marry her to an unloved person is also a serious argument for kidnapping. A real horseman will not allow his beloved to suffer next to a stranger and will steal the girl, and the parents will have to agree with their daughter’s choice.

In general, it is incorrect to consider the wedding customs of the peoples of the Caucasus separately from historically accepted traditions. Many Caucasian girls believe that only by abduction do true horsemen show the strength of their feelings and the seriousness of their intentions. Young Caucasians, in turn, sooner or later come to the understanding that it is better to marry a girl out of mutual love than to connect your life with a person who secretly hates her husband.

Bride kidnapping process

How does bride kidnapping usually happen? Relatives, friends or parents help the groom steal his beloved. Ancient legends say that a real horseman kidnaps his future wife on horseback, throws her over the saddle and gallops off in an unknown direction. Today, the role of a horse is perfectly performed by a car. Having guessed the time when the chosen one is left alone, a car drives up to her, the door opens, one or even several guys kidnap the girl and quickly leave.

The stolen Caucasian bride is then hidden in the house of the groom's parents, where she must spend the night. This is done so that the girl and her parents do not have the opportunity to refuse the wedding. Among eastern peoples, an unmarried woman should not spend the night outside the house, but if this happens, the girl is considered disgraced. In the future, her personal life will be very difficult - no one will want to marry her. Therefore, kidnapped girls have to agree to marriage so as not to disgrace their relatives. The captive has only one way to save her honor and evade an unwanted marriage, for this she needs to escape from custody before dawn.

After a night spent in the kidnapper's house, a Caucasian girl makes her choice: agrees to the wedding or refuses the forced marriage. As we have already said, refusal can have serious consequences, such as inciting enmity between the boy's family and the kidnapped girl's family. The presence of an intimate relationship on this night is not a decisive argument. If the girl agrees to the wedding, then together with the groom she goes to bow to her parents. They often refuse blessings. But after the birth of their first child, parents most often change their decision and recognize the young family.

The official position of Caucasian elders and religious leaders is that kidnapping a girl is a bad way to start a family. A bride's negative morale can lead to dire consequences, sometimes even suicide. The law here is to protect the rights and interests of women. The parents of the abducted woman can file a complaint with the police, and then a criminal case will be opened against all persons who were involved in the violation. But, if after some time the girl’s family withdraws the complaint about the kidnapping, settling the issue on their own, and the girl agrees to the wedding, the case will be closed.

Possible endings for such stories

Many hot horsemen, when going to kidnap their beloved, do not think about the consequences. It’s wonderful when, as a result of such an act, a new happy family is born. But this is not always the case. It is much sadder if a girl gets married against her will. The further development of events is very predictable: either over time she will “endure herself and fall in love” or the girl will hate her husband all her life. Sometimes it happens that a loving horseman soon loses interest in his wife.

Happy End

Feeling warmth and tenderness for a young man, a Caucasian girl for various reasons may be deprived of the opportunity to start a family with him: a parental ban, an unmarried older sister, different social statuses with her fiancé. In this case, the rite of abducting the bride most often ends happily: the young people get married as if against their parents’ will, but after the birth of their first child, after asking for blessings, they receive forgiveness. The incident of abduction remains in the past, and the groom, according to tradition, is recognized by the girl’s parents as her husband.

Shame of the bride and enmity between clans

On the night when the girl remains in the house of the kidnappers, they try to persuade her to start a family, demonstrating the best qualities of the groom: wealth, courage, social status. And it often happens that the bride gives her consent to the marriage. If the girl is categorically against it, the parents take their daughter home, not paying attention to traditions. It happens that the kidnapper himself lets the girl go home, having lost interest in her due to her inaccessibility.

The kidnapping of a daughter is a shame for the whole family. Therefore, as a result of such a daring act, enmity between families is possible, sometimes leading to bloody revenge. The person who is responsible for the event is the one who is most affected by what is happening. She faces a difficult and joyless choice: to marry someone she doesn’t love or to give up the wedding and thereby face shame for the rest of her life. Often, the last thing girls want is to become the cause of family feud, so they agree to marry even an unwanted man. It’s good if the husband turns out to be a kind and affectionate person who, over time, will be able to win the favor and even the love of his wife.

Criminal prosecution

Legislation and spiritual leaders of the Caucasus are seeking to influence this tradition. According to the canons of the state and Sharia, the kidnapping of a girl, and even more so, psychological and physical violence against her, is unacceptable. Articles for kidnapping are also spelled out in the criminal code. If the victim's parents decide to file a complaint with the police, they will accept it. If proven guilty, the thief and his accomplices face imprisonment for a term of 5 to 15 years.

Cases when theft is justified

In some cases, the kidnapping of a Caucasian bride is considered justified. Firstly, when a girl is kidnapped with her consent. Rejection by parents on either side, different social status is not a reason to deprive young people of personal happiness. Kidnapping the bride in this case is a forced act of lovers.

When a Caucasian family has an older unmarried sister(s), the younger one does not have the right to marry earlier. In this case, an ancient custom can help out, or rather, the spectacle of stealing a younger sister. Such abduction occurs with the consent of the girl’s parents, and sometimes even with their direct participation.

Video: kidnapping a bride in national costumes

How to celebrate a wedding in the best traditions of Eastern peoples? Compliance with long-standing customs for today's Caucasian youth is a tribute to their ancestors. In large cities, bride kidnapping is perceived as a theatrical performance. The family's coat of arms on the car is a symbol of the purity of the kidnapper's intentions, and the kidnapping itself is proof of the true love of the Caucasian. The girl is happy because for her sake her lover decided to take a bold masculine action. You can watch in detail how abduction by mutual consent occurs in our video:

Scene 2: training for young people and witnesses from Baba Yaga

Baba Yaga. Here I am, my dears, I see right through people. I can read their thoughts at a great distance. Do you young people know how to read each other’s thoughts?

Young. Sometimes.

Baba Yaga. Do you want to practice?

Young. Yes.

Baba Yaga. The witness and the groom, the witness and the bride should discuss among themselves and write down on a piece of paper the ten most important advantages of the groom and the 10 most important advantages of the bride. But do it this way. The witness and groom remain in the hall, and let the bride and witness leave the hall. If at least 7 coincides, then the thoughts of the young people will coincide in life

It is very important! I'll give you two minutes

After the bride and the witness left the banquet hall, the witness tells the bride that the Serpent Gorynych is stealing her and wants to make her his wife. A cardboard castle and an inflatable Snake are taken out from a hidden place. The three-headed man allegedly takes the young woman far away to his castle. Use a refrigerator box as a lock, cut lengthwise and along the bottom. Windows are drawn.

Baba Yaga. Time is over. Bride-in-law, please go to the hall!

The bride does not come out and does not answer. Baba Yaga repeats the request several times, but to no avail. The groom and guests attack Baba Yaga with reproaches that she promised not to be harmful.

Baba Yaga. Yes, I promised and I keep my word! I have nothing to do with this! Now I'll see where our beauty is.

Baba Yaga stands in the center of the hall, takes out a large magnifying glass and points it towards the exit.

Baba Yaga. This is my all-seeing eye. It will now show us all where the daughter-in-law has disappeared.

At this time, the bride and witness enter the hall, separating themselves from everyone with a cardboard castle. It’s as if the bride is imprisoned in Gorynych’s castle.

Dread Pirates

The host assembles a team of pirates from guests, led by the main pirate. It will be more effective if the pirates quickly come up with appropriate images for themselves, for example, one eye, a bandana, a paper parrot around their neck, and so on. The main pirate conceived a cunning plan - to kidnap the bride and receive a ransom for her. Pirates burst into the hall, grab the bride and take her to a secluded place. The friend and the groom will have to save the celebration and find the stolen bride. But in order to get it back, you need to give a ransom to the pirates - for example, 100 gold coins (one coin is a simple 10 rubles or 50 kopecks). The number of coins depends on the number of guests in the room. Music sounds, and boyfriend and girlfriend begin to collect tribute, run around the hall and collect gold from the guests. When the required amount has been collected, the main pirate is called, the collected ransom is given to him, and the pirates release the bride into the hot embrace of the groom. Seeing the sincere feelings of the young, the pirates donate their ransom to the budget of the young family.

Tips for organizing a bride kidnapping

Bride kidnapping is an ancient custom that existed among many peoples, so it is often performed at weddings. Sometimes, even without the consent of the newlyweds, tipsy relatives may decide that it is time for entertainment, and the main one is the demand for ransom from the groom. The scenario must be drawn up so that the kidnapping occurs when everyone is a little drunk, but still retains their common sense.

Things to consider when creating a kidnapping:

Its duration is 10-15 minutes, no more

If the ritual drags on too long, the guests’ attention will wander, and even the most interesting scene will seem boring. Fully discuss all stages of the event with the bride. Warn the groom that they will carry out a kidnapping without disclosing the sequence of the process. Prepare a comfortable room where the bride and witness will be. If possible, install a TV in the room and broadcast live from the hall. After all, the bride should see how hard the groom is trying. Prepare the props without anyone noticing.

The main thing that the bride must do is to facilitate her abduction in every possible way. This will help to quickly and efficiently carry out tests or redemptions.

Subtleties of kidnapping

  • It is better to kidnap the bride together with a friend so that she is not bored;
  • It is better to hide on the street, and not inside a restaurant. Vigilant workers can arrange their own kidnapping and the ransom will have to be paid to them.
  • You should not hide the bride too far, otherwise you will have to look for the kidnappers along with the bride.
  • You should not hide the bride in dirty places - attic, basement, etc. Her beautiful attire will come to an end.
  • Do not force witnesses to drink from the bride's shoe. They need to keep a level head.

KNOWLEDGE BASE: Scenario for a small wedding evening at home - decoration, preparation, competitions

For the groom

Cool competitions for the groom at the ransom will allow everyone present to laugh heartily and relax, and the groom himself will be able to show his best qualities, be it acting talent, dexterity or intelligence.

You are my teddy

Soft toys of various shapes and sizes are laid out on a flat surface. The groom, blindfolded, needs to feel all the proposed options, choosing from them the toy that most resembles the bride. To make the competition more difficult, you can take various household items instead of plush animals.

Carlo

As props for this competition, you will need a medium-sized piece of wood and a well-sharpened knife. The bridesmaids pass the props to the groom with a request to demonstrate how the hero of the occasion knows how to “plane children.” At the end of the competition, guests must decide which spouse the child is like.

Groom dance

Music is played for the groom, to which he must dance merrily. But the catch of the competition is that the music is constantly changing, and the groom has to adapt to a new rhythm every time. The hosts of the ransom must prepare in advance a selection of 10-15 different melodies. To complicate the task, you can force the groom to tie bows from multi-colored ribbons during the dance.

Oculist

The young groom is greeted by a guest wearing a medical gown, a doctor's cap and a reflector on his head (all props can be rented at costume shops). An impromptu ophthalmologist introduces himself to the groom, saying: “We are looking for a healthy groom for our bride! Let's check your vision!" After these words, the presenters bring out a poster with various dates that are significant for the newlyweds. The date of acquaintance, the bride's birthday, the anniversary of the relationship is best suited. The groom guesses each date. He can be fined for incorrect answers.

A gift from the heart

The bridesmaids bring out a basin to the groom, offering to put in the bottom the best gift that is dear to the bride’s heart. The newly-made spouse will begin to sort through options with friends, settling on various things. But all these options are wrong. The test continues until the groom guesses that he should sit in the basin.

Attention! If the competition drags on, guests may get bored. After several incorrect options on the part of the groom, you can safely give tips

Fisherman

The bride and her three friends tie ribbons to their wrists and then hide behind a screen. Ribbons are extended into the hall. The groom, like a real fisherman, must “catch” his betrothed. If the bridesmaid is hooked, the fisherman pays a ransom. The competition continues until the real hero of the occasion is found.

Bride ransom: 28 tests for the groom

If for some reason you have a ransom, we recommend using several tests from this proven list to fill out the scenario.

1. There is a thread in the entrance door, you can’t gnaw it, you can’t crawl over it, you can’t touch it, but the groom must pass through. What to do? The thread needs to be cut.


2. In order for fewer tears to flow in a marriage, you need to shed them now. In front of the groom stands a bucket with some water left in it. You need to make sure that the water overflows over the edge, but you cannot touch the bucket. The groom puts as many different items as possible into the bucket.

3. The groom and his witness are met by the bridesmaids. In their hands they hold a tray with three glasses. The groom needs to fill them so that they ring, rustle, and hiss. The witness puts coins into one glass, bills into another, and champagne into the third.

If the groom does not fulfill any wish, then the previous one is offered to him again. For example, the presenter says: “Put what is spilling out into this glass.” The groom replies: “I don’t have that.” And the presenter says: “Then put what rustles into the glass again.”

4. An obstacle in the form of a ladder appears on the groom’s path. At each step the groom answers a question from the bridesmaids.

Questions:

— Name the day when you met your fiancée? —Where did such a significant event take place? — What shoe size does your fiancée wear? — What is her waist size?

- Tell me the full name of your future mother-in-law. — On what day will you wish your future mother-in-law a happy birthday? — Name your bride’s favorite flowers. — What color are your bride’s eyes?

— Name your beloved’s favorite color. - Name your favorite time of year. — What would your bride prefer: a candlelit dinner, going to a disco or conjuring a new culinary recipe? - Where does she prefer to relax: at sea, in the mountains, in the forest?

— Name your bride’s favorite perfume. — What cuisine does your future wife prefer: Chinese, European or Russian? — What will come first for your wife: family or work? — How many children does your fiancee want to have?

— What animal does your future wife associate you with? — Does your beloved believe in the horoscope? — What was your fiancee’s favorite subject at school? — What affectionate nickname did your bride have as a child?

- Do you remember the words with which you declared your love to your fiancée? — What does your wife think: who will be the boss of the house? — What does she like more: ice cream or cakes? - What do you think - if such an opportunity presents itself, will your wife go on vacation to the resort without you or not?

— What animal does your future wife want to have at home? — Does she like to play sports? - How many non-girlfriends do you have? — Does she like to talk on the phone?

— How does she react to compliments from a stranger? — How much time does your future wife spend in front of the mirror? — What is her favorite car brand? — Does she like to dance?

— What brand of wine does your bride prefer? — Does your bride agree with the statement that with a sweetheart there is heaven in a hut? — What does your chosen one like more: giving gifts or receiving them? — What qualities does your chosen one not tolerate in men?

— What does your bride prefer on a day off: sit in front of the TV, go to the theater or go to nature? — What music does your beloved listen to most willingly? — Describe your future wife in three words.

If the groom does not know the correct answer to a question or answers not entirely accurately, then he pays a ransom.

The test ends only when the groom, having answered questions or paid a ransom that will satisfy the bride's guests, overcomes the last step of the stairs.

5. A leaflet in the form of an announcement is attached to the door leading to the bride’s room. In the center of the ad is a colorful inscription: “Call me, beloved!” Below this advertisement is cut into strips. Tearing off each strip, the groom must somehow call his bride. Or another option: on each strip, write the letter with which the epithet will begin. If he cannot call his betrothed with an epithet for this letter, then a ransom is paid. The test continues until the bride responds.

6. Several inflated balloons are tied in front of the door to the bride’s house. Inside each ball there is a piece of paper with an inscription. On one of the pieces of paper write “key”, and on the rest - some kind of ransom. The groom must burst the balloon and if inside the balloon there is a piece of paper with the inscription of the ransom, then he must pay it, and continue to burst the balloons further, but if he finds a piece of paper with the inscription “key”, then the competition ends.

7. A wet towel is required for this test. The bride's friends offer this towel to the groom and say: “Tie the towel as tightly as you love your future wife.” Then the witness says: “Now untie the towel as quickly as you can air your quarrels out of the house.”

8. The bride, two or three bridesmaids and the grandmother are locked in a room. A thread is tied to each one (to a finger), which will stick out from under the door. When the groom approaches the locked room, the witness invites him to choose any string and pull it. Whoever this thread was tied to leaves the room. The witness says: “Take her as your wife or pay tribute.” The competition continues until the groom guesses his bride.

9. On the threshold of the room where the bride is sitting, her brother appears before the groom. The groom needs to pay him off. He offers him money, drinks, candy, etc. If the brother is not satisfied with the amount that was offered to him for his sister, he says: “Not enough!!! Few!!! Put more!!!" The competition continues until he is satisfied.

10. When the groom overcomes all obstacles and finally finds the bride, it turns out that she does not have a shoe. He is asked to find her. In front of him will be 3 boxes, one of which will contain the treasured shoe. For each incorrectly guessed box of shoes, the groom pays a ransom. The test ends when the groom finds his betrothed's shoe and elegantly puts it on his beloved's foot.

11. The bridesmaids offer the groom an apple studded with many matches. All matches must be whole, and one must be half. One of the bridesmaids should hold the apple so that the broken match is as far away from the groom as possible.

The groom will not have to take out the matches one at a time, while calling his beloved with an affectionate word. These can be a variety of epithets, such as: my beloved, the most beautiful, very kind, gentle, or affectionate nicknames such as kitten, my sunshine, etc. The competition continues until he finds the broken one.

12. Any letter is drawn on the steps. The groom, overcoming this obstacle, steps on the step with the letter. At the same time, he must give his bride some definition that begins with this letter. If the groom cannot come up with anything for a given letter, then in order to move on, the groom must pay a ransom.

13. The bridesmaids and the bride herself leave imprints of their lips on the mirror. The groom must find the desired imprint of lips - the lips of his bride.

14. A bridesmaid stands in the way of the groom with a chamomile in her hands. On each petal of this chamomile, memorable numbers for the young are written in advance.

— date the bride and groom met; - the hour of their first date; - year of birth of the future mother-in-law, father-in-law; — bride’s waist size;

- future wife's shoe size; - number of best friends of the bride; - bride's birthday; - height of the bride;

- the number of expected children in the family; — bride’s ring size; — the bride’s favorite number; - the number of guests invited to the wedding.

The groom must, by tearing off a petal, guess what this or that memorable number means. For every incorrectly guessed task, he pays a ransom.

15. A basin is placed in front of the groom. The witness asks him: “Put here the most valuable gift for your bride.” The competition continues until the groom realizes that the most valuable gift is himself, and puts his feet in the basin.

16. Take a large jar, place keys at the bottom and fill it with an opaque drink. The groom, with the help of a witness and other guests, must drink the entire contents of the jar. If the groom does not finish his drink for any reason, he pays as much as the bride’s friends or relatives tell him. At the end of the competition, the groom takes out the key to the door leading to the bride's room.

17. Photos of babies hang on the door of the bride's apartment. The groom must find his bride among them. Each attempt pays a ransom.

18. There are many balls attached to the wall, each of which contains a piece of paper with an inscription of the reason why the groom is getting married. - mom orders; - friends advise; - I’ll get married because I’ll get married; - because of money, etc. The groom's task is to burst the balloon and read the reason. He pays in hard cash for every attempt. The competition ends as soon as he finds a piece of paper with the inscription “I’m getting married because I love him.”

19. In front of the groom there are three multi-colored footprints, color up. He chooses and on the back reads why he is “really” marrying: for love, for convenience, out of need. If the groom makes the wrong choice, then he has to pay a ransom and try again.

20. Footprints are attached to the entrance (and they can even be located on walls and railings). The groom needs to follow the tracks with the help of a witness and friends.

21. An apple weighs in front of the groom, which he must eat without using his hands.

22. 10 ribbons are stretched in the doorway. The witness must name ten positive qualities of the groom; when naming each quality, one ribbon is cut.


23. The witness is standing on the threshold of the house with a tray. The groom must put the bride's name on it in money.

24. There is a sheet of white paper hanging on the wall. The groom must draw a portrait of the bride on it.

25. The groom is offered cards face down. The cards are specially made: different funny faces are drawn on all of them (you can find many interesting ones on the Internet and print them out), and a photo of the bride is glued to one. The groom draws a card. If he pulled out a portrait of the bride, then hurray, if he pulled out something else, he pays a fine.

26. Along the flight of stairs leading to the bride’s apartment, there are footprints glued to the steps. The groom must step on each footprint and at the same time say what household chore he will do. If the groom does not step on some trail, he pays a fine; if he does, but cannot name the matter, he also pays a fine. Several traces can be glued to the walls and railings. It will look funny when the groom tries to step on them.

27. A Whatman paper with a picture of a castle is taped to the entrance wall, windows open at the castle, and a little man is drawn in each window. He finds a picture of a girl with a veil - you guessed it, for every mistake there is a “fine”.

28. The key to the door of the bride’s apartment is frozen in an ice cube, the groom must warm it with the “warmth of his heart,” that is, melt the ice with his hands. Witnesses and guests can help him so that he doesn’t freeze at all.

Secrets of organizing a bride kidnapping

Many young people want to diversify their wedding in such an interesting way. But sometimes, a seemingly ordinary tradition can lead to unpleasant consequences. Often on forums people speak negatively about this wedding period. They describe stories when the groom did not understand the joke, after which he had to be searched for several hours. Or tipsy guests tried to take the bride away and got into an accident. And in some cases, the ransom of the kidnapped girl became the most boring episode. And today we will try to figure out how to kidnap a bride so that everyone has fun. And when is it better to abandon such an idea?

  • Discuss with the newlyweds. You need to know the clear position of the newlyweds. If at least one of the two disagrees, it is better to abandon the idea.
  • Theft and ransom are two different things. Often the groom does not want to buy the bride a second time, and does not see much difference between the two traditions. It is worth noting that the girl’s ransom from her parents’ house is carried out with money and gifts. And ransoming a kidnapped wife is a way to test your ingenuity and resourcefulness with the help of funny tasks.
  • Kidnapper. Select the kidnapper in advance. This must be a responsible person who knows the limits of alcohol and understands the limits of what is permitted.
  • Place of the bride's imprisonment. The room where the young woman is hidden must be found in advance. It must be clean and located near the hall where the groom will bathe her. After all, the bride also has the right to observe what her beloved is capable of for her sake. In some scenarios, the bride is not taken out of the hall, but is simply surrounded by thieves, or tied up with a symbolic ribbon. Thus, the girl can watch everything that happens without leaving the room.
  • Selecting a key figure. As a rule, the groom and witness are responsible for the safety of the bride. Therefore, two people must participate in competitions. But here it is worth remembering that fun tasks are achieved if the artistic talents of the groom and best man are at their best. When they are serious or inhibited, you can bring in other people to play.

The main task of the bride kidnapping ritual is to amuse the guests and newlyweds. And to make the competitions fun, feel free to involve everyone who can bring the task to life.

Time of theft

The bride is kidnapped in the middle of a banquet. It is best to do it before serving hot food.

One of the guests shouts: “Unknown people stole the bride!” After this, all the guests, together with the groom, begin to look for the girl. At the same time, they collect ransom for the kidnappers. At this moment, the waiters collect the dirty dishes and bring hot food to the table. And the guests leave the table and participate in the search for the bride.

KNOWLEDGE BASE: Releasing doves at a wedding: a beautiful action or an ancient tradition

Be sure to warn the toastmaster about the theft.

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