With the onset of spring, newlyweds are increasingly seen in parks and the main attractions of the city. After all, each of us has dreamed of an ideal wedding ceremony since childhood. Everyone decides for themselves in what style, according to what customs and when this solemn moment will take place.
Over the years, the methods and rituals of traditional weddings have undergone changes. For example, usually an Orthodox wedding lasted two days; nowadays you no longer see such features. In addition, celebrations on fasting days were completely excluded. However, many of the traditional rituals are firmly integrated into the scenario of modern marriages.
So how is a Christian wedding performed?
Bachelorette and bachelor parties before the wedding
A couple of days before marriage, the newlyweds celebrate a bachelorette and bachelor party. Previously, this meant the last meeting of the bride with her friends and the groom with friends. The festivities were accompanied by parting and sad songs, as each of them said goodbye to a free life. Now, this event is more of an entertaining nature.
In the morning, before the wedding ceremonies begin, the bride and groom must receive the blessing of the main people in their lives - their parents. Only then does it make sense to continue the ceremony. The groom's responsibilities also include preparing the wedding bouquet and presenting it to the bride. To appease the bridesmaids, the future husband can send them a special box with souvenirs.
Church wedding plan
Future newlyweds need to create a wedding day script. It should consist of the following steps:
- Ransom. This custom goes back to ancient times. The groom had to pay money for his bride to her parents to prove his love and devotion. Now the payment is symbolic in nature and the amount collected from the ransom goes to the family budget of the newlyweds. The future wife and her girlfriends must come up with tasks that the groom will perform;
- Marriage registration. In our state, in order to officially be considered husband and wife, it is necessary to register their union in the registry office. If the newlyweds do not plan to have a grand celebration, they can do it together without guests and relatives;
- Wedding. This is the main condition for observing all church traditions at a Christian wedding. Young people often get married directly on the wedding day or the next day. Only after this ritual has been completed, the newlyweds’ relationship is considered legal according to Orthodox canons;
- Wedding photo shoot. Nowadays, not a single wedding celebration is complete without this;
- Festive banquet. It is impossible to imagine a wedding without a feast. The newlyweds are blessed in front of him by their parents with a loaf of bread, and then everyone goes to the banquet hall.
- Entertainment. It may include congratulations, toasts, dancing and competitions.
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Traditional bride price
Traditionally, a Christian wedding begins with a bride price. Here the groom must prove to everyone present that he is the one worthy of her hand and heart. This ritual is accompanied by various competitions, songs and fundraising. This custom has very distant roots and its essence is precisely that the groom must, in the literal sense, buy his bride from his relatives for money. In modern ransom, money no longer plays such an important role, and sometimes even just a symbolic one. Nowadays, more and more importance is being given to competitions, through which the groom smoothly approaches the bride to give her the wedding bouquet.
Bridal clothes
There are practically no rules for the groom, except that the clothes must be clean and decent.
There are a number of requirements for the bride’s appearance.
- Shoes must be closed and stable. This is due to the fact that the ceremony takes a long time, and to prevent your feet from getting tired, your shoes should be comfortable.
- The veil should not be too long, and the dress should not be too fluffy, otherwise the bride becomes flammable - the fabric can easily catch fire from the flame of a candle, of which there will be many around.
- The hairstyle should not be voluminous, otherwise there will be big problems with putting on crowns
- You should not use bright makeup - the bride will have to kiss the icons, and they will deteriorate under the influence of lipsticks and products with which they will then have to be cleaned.
- The chest, arms and shoulders must be covered. If the dress cannot cope with this, you should use a cape.
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Traditional wedding in the registry office
After the end of the ransom, the newlyweds and guests prepare for a trip to the registry office, where they will officially enter into their union. According to tradition, at this moment, relatives and friends say parting words to the young people.
At the appointed hour, the newlyweds arrive at the registry office with their wedding cortege. There they will have to fill out all the necessary documents and formally conclude their union. This will be followed by a small buffet reception, where the newlyweds will receive congratulations.
At the exit from the registry office, they will have the opportunity to experience another wedding tradition. Guests shower the newlyweds with rice, coins and flower petals. It is believed that such showers will bring prosperity and prosperity to the newlyweds.
Then comes the most important rite for the Orthodox, after which their marriage will also be concluded in heaven - the wedding. This usually takes no more than 40 minutes. After the wedding is over, the newlyweds and guests still have enough time before the evening feast. Therefore, most often, the bride and groom go for a walk around the city's attractions. The walk is usually accompanied by a photo session - adding to the family album.
Then everyone present must visit the groom's house. This is also an old tradition. There they are met by the husband's parents with a wedding loaf. Both husband and wife must take turns to bite off a piece of the loaf that the parents had prepared in advance. The one who bites off the larger piece means to be the head of a young family. Nowadays, visiting the groom’s house is increasingly relegated to the background, and the “bread and salt” procedure itself takes place before the start of the banquet.
Later, the participants of the celebration have a little time to relax before the start of the feast. The banquet usually lasts until late at night, and sometimes until the morning. That’s why it’s so important to gather your strength before starting it.
When to hold a church wedding ceremony
A wedding is a church ceremony. Consequently, its implementation depends on the rules of the Church. It is strongly recommended not to have a church wedding during most holidays. It is also prohibited to get married on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday, as well as on Lent days.
The best days for a wedding according to the church calendar are marked in green in the picture below.
Additionally, the bride needs to check her personal calendar so that the wedding day does not fall on her menstruation. After all, according to the canons, on the days of menstruation a woman is considered dirty and has no right to enter the church.
And considering that each temple may also have its own additional holidays, it is better to discuss favorable days with the priest with whom you are going to get married.
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In general, the best time for weddings and weddings is autumn .
And this is also connected with the traditions of our ancestors. In the spring you have to work - plow, in the summer you have to take care of the harvest, and in the fall, after harvesting, you can play weddings. Another time for weddings is early spring - before the sowing season.
Banquet marriage registration field
At the restaurant, they are waiting for a hall that has already been decorated and the host of this event is the toastmaster. It is on his shoulders that the mood of everyone present at the wedding falls. At the banquet, each of the guests is given the opportunity to personally congratulate the newlyweds on their sealed union, present gifts and say parting words. Each toast is accompanied by general cries of “bitter”, which also came to us from ancient times. “Bitter” has always meant a sweet life together, so this word is often pronounced at celebrations.
A special place in the celebration is occupied by the traditional dance of the bride and her father, after which the father hands his daughter into the hands of the groom. After which the newlyweds dance their dance and all the gathered guests join them. This marks the beginning of the festive evening.
A Christian wedding is accompanied by numerous competitions and jokes in which everyone can take part. At the end of the evening, the bride traditionally throws a bouquet. The lucky one who manages to catch him will be the next to get married.
After the end of the banquet, the bride and groom leave to the venue of their first wedding night amid applause.
The right words are important
I will not give scenarios for this ritual. Those who wish can find many of them on the Internet. Therefore, I will only dwell on some important stages of matchmaking. We have already discussed what to tell matchmakers above.
The newlywed candidate, even if he came with them, must remain silent. The matchmakers are the first to speak. As usual, at the end of the greeting and notification of the purpose of the visit, they usually say: “We have an excellent merchant, he will be a decent father. He is also a good husband and a reliable protector. We'll tell you everything and show the groom. Whether you like it or not, we’ll ask your beauty.”
Then they can come up with a series of comic tests for the girl or, for example, give an answer to questions like “If you wash a pan, which side do you rub longer - outside or inside?” etc.
On the part of the betrothed, a number of tasks and tricky questions can also be prepared to test the skills of the candidate for husband. Here, as they say, you can have a lot of fun.
But the stage of the marriage proposal, when the guy turns to the father and mother of the young woman with a request to marry his daughter to him, is completely serious. When this is done, at the beginning of matchmaking or when everyone sits down at the table, it doesn’t matter. But the fact that this moment requires the most serious approach should be remembered.
In general, the matchmaking ceremony requires special preparation. After all, if relatives on the fiancée’s side can respond and act impromptu during it, then matchmakers should know what and when to say. Often their speeches are spoken in prose, but there are also poems for matchmaking on the part of the groom, for example:
Welcome under your roof, owners! We have come to you from afar. But our business is not easy: There lives with us a well-done prince, a brave daring man in all matters. One day he saw a beautiful firebird, in all respects his queen, and since then the young man has been yearning. We came to your house to look for this girl. We brought you a great guy! The merchant is excellent for your product! Dressed to the nines - looks decent, has its own corner and personal transport. There is money - not poor, easy character - character is not harmful. How's it going with your fiancee? Are you ready for marriage yet?
Of course, modern collusion is mainly just a tribute to customs. After all, only in the remote outback can you find a serious approach to this matter. For the most part, now it’s just an acquaintance between the parents of the bride and groom. Therefore, the scenario of this event has been greatly simplified and is not as significant as before.
But some couples are trying to somehow revive long-standing traditions in order to make the wedding celebration more vibrant and memorable. I would like to hope that my story will help them in some way. Good luck!
https://www.syl.ru/article/187793/new_stsenariy-svatovstva-so-storonyi-jeniha-stsenariy-svatovstva-nevestyihttps://wedding42.ru/mores/kak-svatat-nevestu/https://alice- wedding.me/do-svadbyi/traditsii/svatovstvo-so-storonyi-zheniha.html
Second wedding day
As morning comes, it is time to celebrate the second day of the Christian wedding. This event usually does not last long, since the newlyweds still have their honeymoon ahead. Usually, the second day is accompanied by a small feast, which ends in the late afternoon. It is customary to share your impressions of the first day of a Christian wedding, what was done and what you would like to avoid. Usually the celebration takes place in a small circle.
In the old days, there was a tradition according to which the groom had to visit his mother-in-law’s house on the second day, who was supposed to treat him to home-cooked food. The secret was that he had to buy back everything he was treated to.
Nowadays, many rituals have faded into the background. Those that remain are of an entertaining nature. Therefore, each of us must decide for himself what his Orthodox wedding will be like, because there are many options for holding it.
Competitions
It is very difficult to come up with competitions for a real religious celebration. It is necessary to make them as correct, non-vulgar and understandable as possible. Otherwise, Orthodox Christians are the same people who have a great sense of humor.
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The following can be used as competitions for a Christian evening:
- Karaoke - several participants are called on stage, each one is given a song that the guest must perform. The more songs a person performs, the greater the chance of winning.
- This competition is more suitable for newlyweds. Guests write stories related to one of the spouses on a piece of paper. Then all these stories are read out, and the young people must guess who wrote such a text.
- The groom calls his friends and they call the names of the flowers in turn. The young man who names the most names will win. The bride calls her friends. They should tell her what to cook for her husband. The girl who names the most dishes is considered to have won this competition.
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Ritual with birch
Even in ancient times, young girls who wanted to get married soon performed one very effective ritual near a birch tree. To do this, they got up early in the morning and then walked to the nearest birch tree. Standing near the tree, they began to look for a leaf that had been frozen. They tore off the leaf they found and then looked into the frost as if in a mirror, supposedly admiring themselves.
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It was believed that a girl who performed such a ritual became attractive to men, as a result of which she very quickly found her soul mate and got married.
